Kramer’s Blog

Random thoughts from an over-thinker…

The Funniest Joker and a Valentine’s Toker… January 22, 2010

Everyone is up in arms about all this Jay Leno – Conan O’Brien chaos. I think the whole situation is rediculous but I do have an official position on the issue. I’m “Team Conan”, as they say. For years I’ve been saying that no one can make me laugh like Conan O’Brien. The guy is just SILLY and his humor is so random. I mean, he’s got a masturbating bear and a rottweiler puppet that insults people with a cigar hanging out of his mouth. That’s comedy at it’s finest. I think I gave my thoughts on this in my blog a couple months ago about the mustache fights. Well, since then some things have changed. I still have strong opinions about Conan and that fact that he is hands down the funnier of the two, but there’s a new star player in the ballpark of my mind. It’s Ms. Chelsea Handler. When her show started on E! I didn’t give her much credit, mostly because I’d never heard of her. I thought “who’s this smartass nobody with her own show out of nowhere”? Not until recently have I started watching her show on a regular basis and I love her more and more everyday. This bitch is so quick-witted and sarcastic that she can go toe to toe with anyone that comes her way. One false move and she’ll rip you apart before you even knew what happened. I ENVY her comedic talent and her clever sarcasm. I officially want to be Chelsea Handler when I grow up.

I was trying to tell my mom how funny I thought Chelsea Handler was last night and she had no idea who I was talking about. I had to drop some knowledge on dat ass. Not really. I just steered the conversation in another direction because I didn’t want her to feel old for not knowing what the hell I was talking about. I took her to a movie and we saw “It’s Complicated” with Meryl Streep and Alec Baldwin. I figured it was a safe movie to see with my mom and a friend of mine told me it was hilarious. Well, she was right. It was HILARIOUS. I’ve always thought Alec Baldwin was brilliant but I’ve never liked Meryl Streep until now. I had a smile on my face through the entire movie but mostly because my mom kept laughing hysterically. I also learned that my mom likes to do the movie play-by-play, which I thought was so cute. She’d say “Oh look Daena, he’s gonna fall off that step!” or “Oh my gosh they’re going to get caught smoking that joint!”. Awwww moms, I love ya. She laughed SO HARD at the scene when they were all high that I started to wonder if my moms is a closet toker. Totally kidding, my mom is an angel but as we were walking out I said “ya know mama, I’ve never smoked weed but that movie made me REALLY want to try it!” True story. She just giggled. Hmmmmm…

There was a preview for that movie called “Valentine’s Day” and it has like 17 huge names in it. That movie is going to have to gross like 824 Billion in its first week to break even from all the high-priced actors cast in it. But it looked really funny and like it covered every aspect of Valentine’s Day, not just the cheesy romantic perspective. You know what bugs me? When people try to act like they don’t care and say “every day should be Valentine’s Day” or “I don’t know why people make a big deal out of Valentine’s Day, it’s such a lame holiday”. You know who says those things…PEOPLE IN A RELATIONSHIP!!! If every day should be like Valentine’s Day then should we celebrate your birth every day? Should we drink beer and wear green every day? NO! That’s what makes it fun, doing something MORE or something out of the ordinary on Valentine’s Day for someone special or someone you love! Does your husband bring you long stem roses or make a pointed attempt at some creative romantic gesture to make you swoon on a daily basis!? If he does that shit everyday then you’ve hit the jackpot and I understand why you would have no reason to care about Valentine’s Day. I just hate hearing women that have someone to make them feel special and spend Valentine’s Day with say that  it’s a dumb holiday. Count your freaking blessings and ENJOY this excuse to be showered with love and affection for an extra day and do the same for your man. You also get the single chicks who try to act like they don’t care about Valentine’s Day because “it’s a commercialized holiday with no real meaning”. Whatever it takes to make ya feel better, honey. You know damn well that if you had a man you’d be soaking up all the holiday hype and loving every minute of it. Bitches is crazy, man. The moral of the story is, make the MOST of Valentine’s Day if you have someone to spend it with, don’t just complain about how lame it is. You’re lucky to have someone who is always by your side, so use Valentine’s Day as an extra opportunity to thank them for that. If you’re single, shower someone with love even if you’re not in a relationship. Sometimes giving love feels even better than receiving love. You’ll feel great and the holiday hopefully won’t bring you down just because you’re single.

I think I’ll shower my mama with love on Valentine’s Day. She deserves to feel lots of love because she’s always dishing it out. Maybe I’ll take her to see “Valentine’s Day” at the theater and we can get high together before the movie. Mom, if you’re reading this, I’m totally kidding. I don’t smoke the weeeeeed, I swear. And also mom, don’t tell me if you do read this because it’s just better if I go on thinking that you don’t even know I have a blog.

ps. nobody tell my moms I have a blog.

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Endorphins and the puppy burrito…. October 11, 2009

Laughter produces endorphins. That’s a true statement, right? I really don’t feel like looking it up to verify it but I think I heard someone say that once so I’m going to subscribe to the theory. I had a laugh attack the other day while I was at my desk at work. Nothing crazy happened to spark it. No one even said anything funny to me or was laughing with me. I just saw a funny picture that someone posted on my facebook page and I started giggling at it, and as I kept staring at it I began laughing harder and harder to the point there were tears running down my face. I was so delirious from laughing so hard I felt like I needed a nap afterward. What could have been THAT funny? Here it is……

Little tiny puppy burrito.

Little tiny puppy burrito.

So the best part is…IT’S NOT THAT FUNNY!! Most people would think it’s cute. I didn’t really think it was so much cute as I just kept thinking how this poor sleeping puppy has been made into the most delicious meal ever, a burrito, and it looks so tiny in that giant hand and why is there a clear blue sky in the background??? And it’s SO small, like the size of a rat but it’s not a rat, it’s a puppy….a freaking hilarious puppy burrito. When I showed my coworker what I was laughing hysterically about, her only response was “You’re stupid”. She may be right.

When I was growing up I would get laugh attacks in church and that was the worst, mostly because there are a lot of quiet moments in church and you’re supposed to be all “proper”. I started sitting in the back near the door in case I got the giggles I could sneak out for a minute. I nearly got one in a staff meeting at work last week, too. I had to hold my breath and picture my coworkers naked to keep from bursting out in uncontrollable laughter. So awkward. But it FEELS SO GOOOOOOD to laugh uncontrollably. After the puppy burrito incident I found myself smiling all day. I was driving to get some lunch and I caught a glimpse in my rearview mirror of the most rediculous grin on my face. I looked like an idiot, but I felt crazy happy inside. ENDORPHINS.

What makes you feel crazy happy inside? Besides booze, because I know that’s probably what most of you would say. Booze makes me super happy and super chatty, but it’s not that euphoric type of happy I’m talking about. I’m talking about the “happy” that makes your heart race fast or gives you butterflies. For me it’s my nephews, live music, fireworks, uncontrollable laughter and In-n-Out Burger. Okay, that last one was a lie but I do feel moderate levels of euphoria while eating it. Some people get crazy happy from climbing mountains or jumping from planes. Other people get that feeling just from a creative expression or feelings of achievement. Others only find it when it comes from other people in their lives like their kids or their spouse.  I like learning what makes other people smile and I wish I could bottle it and serve it up as I see necessary because, if you ask me, there’s nothing better than making someone else happy. So when the Angels make it to the World Series in a few weeks, you can be sure I’ll be feeling that crazy, euphoric happy that I’m talking about and the endorphins will be flying….*wink*.

 

I appreciate irony and I love pouring rain… September 22, 2009

There have been a few things that I’ve given a lot of thought to lately. Well, more than a few things considering my wheels are always turning, but a few that keep resurfacing. The first thought that I keep having is that I’m really sad that I won’t be at my own funeral. Don’t laugh, I’m serious. If I had to imagine the most awesome party ever, it would be a room full of ALL of my friends from every corner and stage of my life talking, meeting and reminiscing about fun experiences we’ve shared. Except they’d probably be telling embarrassing stories about me that I made them promise NEVER to tell anyone so that part wouldn’t be so fun, but everything else would be awesome. At “the most awesome party ever” I imagine dancing with all my friends to some old school hip hop with a little Britney mixed in and maybe some Motown. There would be lots of Pirate’s Booty (only the most glorious shot ever), it would be catered by In-n-Out and my dog would be there too. Seriously. But ideally I’d be there, and maybe one day I can make that happen, but most likely it will only be at my funeral that ALL of my friends get to meet. So have fun folks, I’ll be jealous.

Ewwwww, grim huh? So the other thing I’ve been thinking is “be careful what you wish for”. I seem to be witnessing and experiencing a lot of irony lately and I, for one, can truly appreciate a good bit of irony. Ironically, I can’t think of any of the ironic moments that I’ve experienced lately but they will come to me later, I’m sure.

Until I remember the ironies (is that a word?), I’ll move on to the third thing that has been on my brain which is “when it rains, it pours” – an expression that I think makes very little sense but it gets my point across. When it rains it doesn’t ALWAYS pour, right? And ironically, I love it when it pours. <— Oooh, there was some irony. So anyway, it seems like I’m either swamped at work or it’s smooth sailing, never a happy medium. When I’m rediculously busy at work something will almost always come up outside of work that occupies my mind and I can’t seem to focus on work. But ironically I have Office ADD and I alwaysseem to have a hard time focusing at work so maybe that’s not a valid argument. <— more irony. And I invented the diagnosis of “Office ADD”, feel free to use it as you deem necessary. So why can’t God just have an equal rotation pouring on the stress and pressures in our lives? Is it to test our strength or simply make us stronger? Perhaps, but I don’t feel stronger I just feel more sleepy and I sit at my desk sometimes and imagine ways I could crawl under my desk to take a nap unnoticed. I really think I could pull it off, too, if I placed my chair properly and curled up real small, no one would see me. But they’d notice that the things were much quieter around there, that’s for sure. Then sometimes I imagine that my office is really just like the TV show “The Office” and I assign my coworkers to a character on the TV show and when they do something JUST like the person in The Office, I laugh quietly to myself. Actually sometimes I laugh out loud and make fun of them and say “You were just Dwight!” I’m confident that it’s wildly obnoxious and they all think I’m annoying, but I’m ok with that. My coworker, Laura, posted this on my facebook page last week and I think it’s pretty much dead on…

OfficeRetard

So Laura and I created the concept for “The RADIO Office” and it’s a hit TV show starring a handful of our co-workers and us. Anytime something bizarre or awkward happens at work we jot it down for the next episode. It’s pretty safe to say that I work with the most awesome group of people EVER. If you don’t watch The Office, this is probably confusing you and boring you to death at the same time. If you do watch The Office, stay tuned for our own edition of Parkour! in the Radio Office.

So I’ve completely lost my train of thought so I’ll end this blog here. If I remember any more ironies I’ll let you know but I’ll most likely just get distracted and take a nap under my desk instead. Thanks for listening. PARKOUR!

 

Call me out or feed me strawberries…. July 27, 2009

I have been very short tempered this past week. Actually, that’s not entirely accurate. I am actually VERY patient when it comes to my temper, but I really don’t know how else to explain. Maybe the term “irritable” would be a better descriptor. Let’s roll with that…..I’ve been exceptionally IRRITABLE lately. I have no good excuse, so don’t even ask, however I have been making a pointed attempt at acknowledging my poor attitude and doing my best to keep from letting my mood affect those around me. Hasn’t worked like a charm, but I’ve noticed I’ve made some better choices lately than I typically would when I’m being grumpy or overly-emotional.

Seriously. What the hell am I talking about? After reading that paragraph I would have opted out of the rest of this blog. No one cares about my moods or how I deal with them. Eff that noise, I’ll move on to what I had originally intended on blogging about. Things that make me HAPPY. I’m going to keep this short and sweet and just list a few things that I dig. The whole point that I’ve been trying to make is that focusing on things that make me HAPPY have really helped me lose the bad attitude. So here goes…..

  • Fudge-cicles. I just discovered 90 calorie fudge-cicles at Costco and they’re so tasty delicious.
  • When I come downstairs to see Tayler lying on the couch and she’s in some retarded looking shape completely passed out as if she was drunk = Instant smile.
  • The 6-4-3 double-play….with authority.
  • When my sister calls me but I answer and it’s my nephew who says “Hi Aunt Daena”. 
  • Getting a compliment on the color of my toe nail polish
  • Being surprised or unexpectedly thought of with a simple text or invitation somewhere.
  • Fantasy Football is near….very near
  • Carl’s Jr. Commercials
  • Nailing a drum solo on Guitar Hero
  • Having an apple a day
  • Hilarious tweets
  • Having a friend call me on the phone and TELL me to vent. Now that’s a good friend.
  • Wednesday and Thursday mornings with the guys
  • Hazelnut creamer = Glorious.
  • Moral support
  • Direct TV gets installed this weekend with the NFL Package
  • Being called out on something- Yes, I like that….when it’s valid.
  • Street Sweeper Social Club
  • Being told I make the room smell better
  • Introducing friends to friends
  • Strawberries. Strawberries. Strawberries.
  • Having lunch with a friend and a real conversation
  • Angels Games
  • Wearing Pumas instead of heels on weekends
  • Thunder and lightning
  • And finally….LEARNING. Nothing has made me happier than the new and interesting things I’ve learned, learning from my mistakes and learning how to do new things. That feels good.

There you go. Next time I’m a bitch to you, go ahead and call me out on it and remind me of one of these happy things.

 

Sometimes you gotta put your balls out there…. April 27, 2009

Lloyd Dobler is standing outside Diane Court’s window holding up his stereo playing “Your Eyes” in a valiant attempt to touch her heart and make her feel how much he loves her so she’ll come running back to his arms. It’s on Encore right now. Unfortunately the only movie channels I get are Encore, but the good news is that they usually play the best cheesy classics, like Say Anything. Yesterday I watched Dirty Dancing and before that Pretty Woman, and I have strong opinions on Jennifer Grey’s role in Dirty Dancing, but I’ll save that for another blog. So as I watch this dramatic scene for the 43rd time, it makes me think….does anyone really have the heart to put themselves out there so selflessly anymore? Do guys really ever do stuff like that? This isn’t a slam on chivalry or insensitive guys, because I think girls should make the same efforts but I don’t know if people really have the gumption to put their balls out there like that. Yes, I said balls – I utilize any opportunity to work “balls” into conversation. People should have more balls and go for it if something really means a lot to them. This might help you understand how I got the nickname “krameballs”.

Now, I’m single right now so I don’t have any recent stories of romance or thoughtful things that my boyfriend does for me when he screws up or wants to make me happy. But I do have a roommate who does amazingly thoughtful things for me. She leaves nice notes around the house, special cards and treats on every holiday and she brings me home presents and surprises from time to time. It’s like I have a boyfriend, but we don’t make out. Sometimes we spoon, though. I had a boyfriend a long time ago that was great at valiant efforts and bold gestures. For example, one time I came home to a trail of rose pedals leading into the living room where they were spread out EVERYWHERE covering the couch and he had made a fort in the middle of the room, you know, like you did when you were a kid with blankets and sofa cushions. There were candles flickering all over and my favorite CD playing on the stereo. It wasn’t an effort to “win me back” from anything, just a thoughtful expression of his feelings. Impressive, to say the least, but if I told any of his buddies I bet they would have made fun of him for days. I was really spoiled and I wonder if I’ll ever consider anything less than “grand gestures” romantic because the bar was set so high so many years ago. I guess there are many different interpretations of romance; everyone’s perspective could be different. The absolute most romantic thing that has ever been done for me was coming home to find a card taped to my door. Inside were a nice note and two tickets to a Padres game. The card said that we were leaving for San Diego in 2 hours and going to the Pads game and staying in SD for the weekend. No flowers, no wine, no sweet nothings. Whisk me away for a weekend of baseball and the beach and I’m yours – that’s my kind of romance, make a note of it.

Since I don’t have a boyfriend, I try to spread my love on my friends as often as I can. I do have some of the most amazing friends. Sometimes I wonder if you do certain things so often do they become expected rather than appreciated or if true intentions are even acknowledged. Sometimes words just aren’t enough or they lose their value, and I always think actions speak louder than words. But what do you do when your words and your actions don’t seem to make a difference? People become numb so easily; myself included. Does the romance always die over time or is there a secret to keep things fresh and exciting? I don’t hear a lot of romantic stories from my friends that have boyfriends or husbands lately. Maybe they just don’t share everything with me, but I do hear some of their stories and they are unimpressive, to say the least. That’s not just from MY perspective, but from theirs as well. Maybe your opinion of romance changes once you’re married and again when you have kids. Perhaps romance is when daddy offers to take over diaper duty for the night. Or if mommy tells daddy he can go out for beers with the guys while she stays home with the kids. I dunno. Everyone says things change when you have kids or get married, but WHY? I guess if it’s change you WANT then there is nothing wrong with it, but I hear so many of my married friends complain about not being able to ever go out and have any fun with their friends, and if they do they have to check in every hour or so. Do you lose your independence or identity when you get married? If so, then I’m never getting hitched. I just don’t get that stuff, but if other people like it that way, then it’s not for me to judge. Maybe you should tell me how it is. Are you married? In a relationship? Have kids? Does your significant other allow you to go out for the night without calling every hour and without giving you a curfew? Do you prefer having rules and guidelines since you’re married? I have one buddy who is married and he lets his wife go out with the girls and he watches the baby all night. No questions asked, no curfew, no rules and no calls necessary. He actually encourages her to go out and have fun and not worry about him or the baby and she does the same. Other times they go out together with friends and bring the baby along. I love that. They both work full time and have a kid but they are both very independent, too. When I imagine being married and having a kid, I don’t imagine becoming tied down with rules and having to ask permission.  I expect mutual respect, consideration and communication. It’s give and take, but not rules and having to ask permission to go places.

I really don’t know what sparked this topic because I’m not in any situation where romance or rules are an issue. I guess I just watched Say Anything and the sequence of events and I wondered what happened after they got to Europe. Did they remain blissful and openly honest with each other? Did she start school and leave Lloyd feeling lonely and under-appreciated. Maybe they moved back to the US years later and got married only to have 2 kids and get divorced because Diane was having an affair with their pool man. Ya’ never know because things change.  Its amazing how certain you think you are of someone and then something changes and suddenly forever turns in to never again. Are you depressed now? Sorry about that. I actually think that Lloyd and Diane moved to Europe and got married under the Eiffel Tower on a beautiful spring day. They moved back to the US after she graduated and have lived for the past 20 years in Sun Valley Idaho with their 2 kids, their dog named Buddy and they are the perfect picture of love, loyalty and the American dream. Feel better now? Good.

Tell me a story. Tell me your amazing gestures of romance and love. Tell me how someone won you back. Tell me how awesome your marriage is and how life changes in the best way when you have kids. Or tell me what sucks. Tell me that you hate being married or in a relationship. Tell me the obstacles you face that you never thought possible. How have you been disappointed or screwed over in a relationship? Tell me all of it, good or bad, I truly want to know. If you don’t want to leave a comment, email me at imjustkramer@yahoo.com. And I won’t tell anyone, I promise.

 

 

I hit a walk-off homer out of an empty ballpark… April 7, 2009

Filed under: Random,Thoughts,Uncategorized — justkramer @ 8:58 pm

Have you ever been really, super excited about something – soooo excited the you feel giddy and all you want do do is scream, cry and bear hug someone at the same time? Maybe it was something you’ve been working on for a really long time and you finally reached your goal. Or it might be something like a New York Times Crossword puzzle. You’ve been struggling with it for weeks and you FINALLY got that last word and you didn’t even cheat and use google. You feel so accomplished! Perhaps you’ve been playing Guitar Hero and you’ve been trying to get past Metallica “One” on Hard Level and you just can’t get past 82% of the song. Then when you FINALLY get past that tricky part, you feel like you are a true rock star and you want to smash your plastic Wii guitar on the coffee table and stage dive into a crowd of your friends…or the couch. Or maybe you came up to bat in the ninth inning and smacked one out of the park to win the game with a walk off home run and your whole team is waiting for you at home plate to carry you off the field and fireworks are going off in the outfield as the crowd chants your name. Yeah, that would be rad.

OK, so hopefully you’ve thought about a time in your life where you’ve felt that way….or close to it. And by the way, my Metallica reference inspired me to kick on some background music so I’m listening to “Where Ever I May Roam” and my dog is pissed because she’s sleeping with her head on my leg and I keep tapping my foot along with the bass drum. She can move her fat ass if it really bothers her. I digress. Where was I? ……So, imagine you just knocked one out of the park and you round the bases pumping your fist like Kirk Gibson and as you round 3rd to head for home, you don’t see anyone waiting for you at home plate. Everyone is just going about their business. Your teammates are packing up their equipment, fans are just sitting in their seats conversing among themselves, cracking peanut shells and the opposing team looks like they never even saw you swing the bat. There’s just a low murmur of conversation through out the stadium, not a hint of a cheer. That would really suck, huh? All of your adrenaline is still there, waiting to find a release but your butterflies have turned into a huge lump in your throat and a tightness in your chest and you feel completely deflated. Well, that’s how I felt today. I’ll admit right up front, that I definitely didn’t do anything close to hitting a walk off home run. But I had a great day – or at least a great thing happened for me – and I had no one to share it with. I felt like I could fly one minute and 20 minutes later I felt like I had never left the ground. I felt more weighed down than I have in a while. And my first thought was “It’s your own damn fault”.

I am a fairly private person. You wouldn’t know it from the fact that I post a public blog and I’m constantly putting  my personal crap out there for your amusement. But I guess that’s the key…amusement. I don’t typically share my deep, emotional  feelings and I don’t really invite people inside my walls. Well, not usually. I have  a small handful of GREAT friends – the forever friends. I have a HUGE handful of good friends and even more casual, extended friendships. I guess that’s pretty standard, right? I consider myself very lucky to have the friends that I do. So right after my big news I hopped in my car, took out my phone and I knew exactly who I wanted to call to share my awesome news with first. But I just sat there and stared at my phone. I knew 100% that she wouldn’t pick up her phone because she never does. I thought about texting but it just wouldn’t do my excitement justice and I’d just feel stupid. So I just I called another one of my great friends who I thought would definitely answer but for some reason she didn’t pick up. I then emailed her and texted her to call me. No response. I’m definitely not mad becasue I know she was at work and she probably hasn’t even seen my messages. She’d never just ignore me. I was just looking forward to sharing with someone I knew would be genuinely excited with me. Not because they really have any interest in my exciting news, but because they know me and know what makes me tick. I determine how well someone knows me by how well they know my hot buttons or reactions. If you can figure out how to get me excited, tease me to where I actually react, or know exactly how to make me hurt then you know me. Not many people know how to do ANY of those things, let alone all three.

You heard me say “It’s my own damn fault”. Why is it my fault? Well, because in reality, there are probably a hundred people who would have been excited for me if I called them to share my story. There are friends of mine who would have stopped what they were doing and driven to meet me just to give me a hug, even though the whole thing is really trivial to begin with. But I just don’t feel satisfied if I share personal things with people who really don’t KNOW me. You hear what I’m saying? Am I making even a *little* sense? I was needing to celebrate with someone who knows exactly why this stupid thing would make me tick. Truth is, even most of my “forever friends” wouldn’t know the answer to that and I can’t hold it against them. I began to wonder if I need to branch out more or if I should just be me and accept that I’m not the type of person who will ever have a “cheering section”. If I don’t invite any cheerleaders to my party then I can’t complain if they don’t show up, right? Man, that was the most rediculous analogy I’ve ever come up with. Part of me really wants to delete it but I’m supposed to show more of the REAL ME if I ever want to have people to share my stories with. So that’s part of the real me right there. I make stupid analogies, I acknowledge that I suck and I think I’m a lot funnier than I really am. So will you call me now so I can spill my guts and we can scream together over the phone even though you’ll think my story is stupid? Awesome, thanks.

To be honest, I have absolutely no desire to tell ANYONE my story anymore. After writing this blog, I feel a lot better anyway and I think at this point I’d just sound pathetic. LOL. It’s really not even that big of a deal and telling it now would just be nauseating and embarrassing. So instead, I’ll make up crazy, fun stories in case someone who reads this blog asks me to tell them my news. This way I don’t have to show the real, true me. I can just amuse you with made up stories about my personal life and keep you at bay. Wait…..I’m starting to see a pattern developing. DAMN IT! I will never learn, will I? LOL.

There is just no hope for me.  Sorry, folks. 🙂

 

Anonymous blogging and phantom readers… February 10, 2009

Filed under: Thoughts,Uncategorized — justkramer @ 11:59 pm

Do you ever have random questions that you wish you could have an immediate answer to? Or you have a question that you’d never DREAM of asking anyone face to face….or a secret?  Or maybe you aren’t sure what your question is but something is puzzling you.  Well, I find myself in all of those situations quite often and for solutions, I discovered “Yahoo Answers”.  Have you ever asked Yahoo Answers a question? You can ask whatever you want and not feel stupid. It’s amazing. AMAZING. Pretty much anything you could imagine asking is posted on there in some way or another and people just like you and I submit their answers based on experience or simply their opinions. You can even vote on answers and how well they answer the question being addressed. Technology is just insane these days. Everything seems completely accessible at all times. I think YahooAnswers is where you go when you can’t find your answer on Wikipedia. I’ve asked everything from “how to fix a leaky faucet” to serious questions that I wonder if anyone else in the world wonders the same things as me. I think the last thing I asked Yahoo Answers was “How do I save a facebook video to my hard drive?”.  

I have come to the firm conclusion that NO MATTER what you want to ask or what you are going through, there is someone out there in the world experiencing the EXACT same thing, no matter how obscure you think it is. Do you have chronic itchy ankles and ingrown toe nails? Well someone out there has the exact same problem. Need to know the secret codes to unlock songs in Guitar Hero? Well, there are a bunch of people on Yahoo Answers who will share their methods. Okay….you get the picture.

I was tooling around on Yahoo Answers about a year ago and I typed in a very obscure statement. Something that I had been wondering about for a long time and wanted to know if anyone else wondered the same thing.  “Tooling around” is such a funny expression. I’m a big fan of the word “tool” in general. It’s such a fun insult and I can’t help but giggle when I call someone a tool. So anyway, when I typed it in there were a few posted questions that popped up that were similar but not the same as mine. Then I found one that stated EXACTLY the words that I would have said myself. I mean, it was such a specific statement that as I read this post and was in amazement. It kinda creeped me out but I was intrigued. I proceeded to send this chick a message to see how in the hell she came up with the same exact scenario as me and we started emailing back and forth.  We seemed to have parallel lives in so many ways, but not typical ways. It’s not like we both worked in radio and both had a fat dog named Tayler….it was so much deeper than that. Because I didn’t really know ANYTHING about this girl, including her name, I was completely candid when I’d email her. No candy coating and no fear of looking stupid because it almost seemed fictitious. But it makes it so easy when you know they have the same exact thoughts or experiences.  It was completely mind boggling. Most people have a friend or boyfriend who they can relate to and share random stuff with.  I have couple friends who I share everything with but I really don’t ever reveal the depths of what is on my mind. And I’m really not that interesting anyway, I dwell on trivial things. But I’ve told this girl things I could never imagine telling anyone in “real life”. Weird, huh?

So I have a pen-pal. At least that’s what I call her even though I don’t use a pen to write her. I guess she’s an email-pal. We don’t email everyday or anything and there have been times we’ve gone months without communicating. I will never meet her or communicate in any other way other than the email and I kinda like the anonymity of it all. And while having an email-pal that I can chat about certain random things with is awesome, it doesn’t replace the friends that I have that I can spend time with, FEEL and look in the eye. And it can’t replace the friends that know ALL aspects of my life, not just minor things, but it really feels cool for this certain niche. I really think that God puts the right people in your life at the right time, whether or not you ever even get to actually meet them.

My myspace blogs are starting to feel anonymous and fictitious, too, because it doesn’t seem like anyone is on there anymore. Everyone’s on Facebook now. It’s like I’m blogging for imaginary people. LOL. Actually, I’m just blogging for myself but I think I’m a little more candid here now because I’m not thinking of who will read them.  Kinda feels good. Thanks to all you phantom blog readers, I’ll keep ’em coming whether you’re here or not.